Was down with some strange sickness , that , I believe , was more in the mind than in the body . Found that I could not get started in the morning . Last night went bad , had no sleep at all and I sweated a lot , not that I am worried , but I am curious to know the reasons why my health is failing on me sometimes like it never did before .

Spent the day relaxing and getting some sleep . Went out for a walk at dusk like I always do when I have the free time . That took away the constant headache that I have been having since morning , right now I am feeling alright .

I am going through lot of turbulence in my life and I believe that if I do not sort it out soon , it is going to become a bad mess , so I need to spend time and thought towards solving this .

Feeling like going and meeting my girlfriend but it is not that easy . I am missing her very very much .

This problem that I am in , it is quite complicated if I want to solve everything tactfully keeping everybody happy but then again that will require time and this bomb is running a very short fuse that will probably explode before that . I cannot afford to become an extremist and end everything in a blow because that might and probably will ruin a lot of relations .

I am feeling lonely and sad ..... I wish someone understood and I am keeping my hopes high someone will , in the end .

If all fails and there is a just cause still remaining , then I will rebel .